Where do I start? The cousins are still angry and it's been one helluva summer. Been missing this blog and my rants. I'll just go in.

So, I couldn't write or voice my anger and outrage over the systematic removal of Black books written prior to 2007 from the shelves of a certain NYC neighborhood library, because it would compromise my position at a certain government agency for which I found myself working. But, I will say that I am still outraged by this move and folks, our folks, thinking all we want to read is Thong On Fire and Thugalicious (actual titles), and the senseless banter and repetitive nature of my, albeit temporary yet, cathartic job. As I sat on that bench doling out advice and answers to a myriad of unrelated-to-my-work questions, all I could see was a wall of images and none of them looked like me. Aside from the occasional Oprah or Beyonce cover, I stared in disbelief and grew sadder. Not sad for me as much as I am sad for young girls and women who are made to believe they aren't beautiful, or have some twisted, if not non-existent, self-image. So, I vowed to make a difference. Don't talk about it, be about it. Ain't that what Percy said? Starting my own imprint.

Nothing Uber stank happened on the cousin front this summer. Obama is still catchin' it, but any fool could have seen that coming. Michelle chilled in Europe. Tiny and T.I got busted for drug possession. Shame. Like Tip and the movie Takers was a good dude flick. Drake shut the NYC waterfront down. DMX called Plies out for being the "worst rapper EVER"! Harsh from a cat who grunted his way to the top of the charts. King James pulled a fast one on Cleveland and solidified his role as Shameless Self-Promoter. Ricky Ross and Freeway Ricky Ross had it out. Weezy's in jail and folks are gettin' fired over eyeballin' him and showing favoritism. Alicia was called a man-eater and launched a piece of software which another rapper could have launched had he not been afraid of his own success. Concerts are just OK. Went to a House jam in the park that made me feel like there was some hope for music--still.

Watched too much TV. Housewives are out of control. Hair Spectacular is extra. Bad Girls have real issues. Ochocinco and T.O are a bore. Omarosa needs to stick to her day job (what would that be exactly?), and the Black girl got booted week two on Big Brother.

Had some good FB discussions over the usage of the N-word and came to realize that we still have not gotten over our issues with hair and color.

Fall's around the corner and maybe there is some hope for the grape soda lovin' clan this season.

May(hem)

So, been busy doing civic duty and no time to whine about affairs of Black importance, but I will say this--folks we're in big trouble. Government workers are an interesting bunch and out of work folks just happy to have a job, may not always be the best choice of go-to help. I'm just sayin'...

So speaking of work and working together, lending a hand, looking in your own 'hood for quality work and vendors--what's with "us" and our innate inability to work together, for each other and help each other out? What's with folks wanting you to take a chance on them only to turn into the worst nightmare of a paid relationship EVER?! The cousins are just a mess. And they say women can't get along?! Bullshit! We as a group trying to do business can't get along to save our lives. But let other folks offer us work, then we're bending over backwards to help, skinnin' and grinnin' and in full coon mode to prove we're Super Negro on the case. Sad, just sad. Take a lesson from our other colored clans who stick together, will live 14 deep in a 350 square foot apartment just so they can share resources and build a village that all can prosper from. We get greedy, start hatin' on each other and why the person in the hiring position has more than we do, bring all our issues to the project, cryin' broke, have every excuse in the book and can't complete the job on time-if, at all! I'm done. Niggerance and Negronomics are killing us softly, if not swiftly. No doubt, I'll continue to help and hold out hope for a Afrocentric partnership of any kind, but until then--I'm done with the cousins. See you at the reunion and I'll be that uppity recluse of a cousin who found a new and more inviting extended family.

Ah, hot weather is almost here again and the heat ushers the return of winter bodies in tight clothes. Make that big booties in shiny stretch pants. Make that muffin top in jeans meant for Anorexic Annie. And we're talking wife beaters and more plaid boxers and butt cracks than I care to see. Walked the dog last night before the fight and under the glow of the street lamp was the biggest butt and widest hips and perched on cankles and poured into glistening, purple leggings and shiny, cheap white shoes than my eyes have ever seen. Shirt tucked in, lip gloss shining, wig in place and damn-if-I-don't-look-good attitude. Again, not mad at your self-confidence, but you have to know that there's voluptuous, there's ample, there's curvy and then there's just freakish. I will never complain about my shape, again. Ever. Washed my eyes and I was good to go.

And speaking of fights--last night's Sugar Shane vs. Money Mayweather farce was a waste of my PPV money. The under card bouts were more entertaining and, I suppose, made up for Mayweather's not wanting to fight anyone that could remotely challenge him; He's no great fighter, just methodical, fit, fast and strategic in the sense that he picks his battles--literally and figuratively. I loved the fight-corner banter and the commentators (Larry) are a hoot. What I found ironic-- Chris Brown chosen to sing the national anthem at a boxing match, by a fight team who's trainer is going away for allegedly assaulting a woman, a fighter with multiple baby-mamas who dates a woman who had a hit called "No Scrubs". Oh the irony. And then they were all just hanging around the ring pre-fight. Sing and get on with your business. Scrubs get on with your business. Money get on with your life. Poor Shane, maybe there's a hint of sugar in your tank, but you're done.

And then we get Basketball Wives...Oy.

The Tax Man Cometh

Whew, took care of my taxes weeks ago like a good little citizen and I ain't mad at the breaks and the little $63 check I'll get back on a day when I least expect it and no doubt, welcome it. Eating's a good thing. But speaking of the man and tax time, the big O- (not Winfrey--more on her later)- and his wife made $3.5 million dollars last year?! When? How? In between stressing over the Tea Party or pushing for Health Care Reform? Or was he Tiger's secret attorney on a fat ass retainer? And is Michelle working? Is she the Green Grocer or some paid celeb stylist? Must be the insider investment pool. I need to in be in on that deal.

Now back to Madame O. So, bio author Kitty Kelly writes some unauthorized Oprah biography that no media outlet or talk show wants to have her on talking about details of the book for fear O will pimp slap them all- (she learned the move when she was a teen prostitute--allegedly). And her daddy that's been saying he's her daddy is not the father?! Show pitch--maybe Kitty can have Oprah's dads on Maury and she can appear as the disgruntled wife and possible step mama to O and plug the book that way. Or maybe Wendy Williams will have hr on. I don't even think she wants to suffer the wrath of O. Either way, that book is going to sell like hotcakes. My thing is this: have we not had enough bashing of Black celebs in the past year? Tiger, Kanye, Whitney, Tavis and Obama? Let's not forget Tiki and Danger and Usher and Stacy Dash and...Let's just move on. Let's bash Michael Steele and that kinky old bastard, Larry King...you effing stud, you! Divorce numero ocho. Who saw that one coming?

And speaking of Whitney--WTF? Sounding like a dying cat in a thunderstorm. Whoa--little Japanese cat is giving her a run for her money. Just a hot desperate mess. Let it go and retire with some dignity. Must have torn her vocal chords hollering for Bobby (who lost a little post-crack-fried-chicken-eating-binges weight on Celeb Fit Club)--because crack is wack, right?

And what's with those trifling Basketball Wives on VH1? More wifey than wife, hyphee than classy. Just a frickin' train wreck. And then we have Chilli and the list and the requirements. Grow up, ditch the list, quit looking for something you aren't: educated, self-assured and doing big things. You attract what you are and reject what you know you can't handle (unless they're just some icky stalker with a big gut and butt and no teeth like that cat who...I digress). She needs to go on Tough Love and get schooled, then try her show again. Or just get a dog, it's easier.

Time for more mindless boob tube watching. Back to whining later.

Livestream - Rude Girl Presents: REVOLUTION Live!

Livestream - Rude Girl Presents: REVOLUTION Live!

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Let Me Show You the Way To Go

Goodbye, Michael. You will be missed and not soon forgotten. Had a brief crush on him as a young girl, that lasted maybe a month, and I soon realized the chances of us hooking up, were slim to none. I had my own love affair with music and dancing and my own journey to take in the biz. Won a contest on "Dancing Machine" and can still keep up on the dance floor. Did hook up with MJ and family, but years later on a professional level. Interesting how things happen. He won't be replaced. The music biz doesn't have that depth of talent or one who would be king. We have a Prince. Long live the King.

My people, there is a lesson in all this: reading, writing and arithmetic are the branches to the learning tree. Heed those words and you won't end up $400 million in debt, lonely, surrounded by enablers, self-loathing and too fragile to face a cruel world. And if you aspire to make it beyond that one little weak tune you call a hit, be on your game. Rise above. Have a strong work ethic, perfect your craft, remember that you're only as big as your last hit and cream rises to the top. Don't believe the hype, don't screw people, build solid relationships and to thine own self be true.

Been busy checking for news for the digest. Loads of peculiar things going on. It's a weird time-- Usher files for divorce amidst allegations of his wife cheating, his kid not being his kid and looking to another to be his queen. Hmmm...I say the skeletons are yet to be fully out the closet.

BET continues to be the worst excuse for a network--EVER! Do I blame Viacom for jackin' it up or Bob Johnson for not having the balls to be a cut above when he had it and sold it off? Yes! Tradition of lousy craptastic shows just keeps rolling on. Jeez. BET awards should be interesting with folks scrambling to pay tribute to Michael Jackson. Please let it be a retrospective in video, I don't think I can take 3 hours of off key singing, lousy dancing and crotch grabbing.

PETA attempts to swat at Obama for killing a fly. WTF?! Please. Flies are annoying, pesky creatures that eat shit. Shoo, be gone PETA.

Summer's here, school's out and kids are going wild. What happened to the Summer Mayor Youth Programs of the past that gave young folks jobs and something to do? What's up with kids beefin' and killin' each other over ownership of a crackhead? What's wrong with kids not having any respect for life or death, so much so they'll barnstorm a funeral, fight in the parlor and overturn the casket for the body to fall at the deceased boy's mother's feet, only to declare: "It ain't over" ??? My people, have you no shame? Cue music: "Who's bad?"

Tiny and what's her face get a reality show. What's up with that? And what's with I Love New York's show? Is her 15 not up? If it wasn't, then her wack show should have sealed that fate. And since when did Justin become our spokesperson? He's cool and funny, but don't we have some other folks we could call on to rep at Black award shows or to speak for us? They don't call Kanye to speak at the Country Awards on behalf of white folks, so why do we need someone to speak for us at our shows? Just an observation.

Michael--you gave us great moments, memories, hope, aspiration, laughs, conversation starters, controversy, reflection, lessons and for me--a passion for performance and production. Thanks.

Just curious

Yet another uneventful week in the land of Black folk. Obama continues to wow and do his thing. I still get misty-eyed when I see anything that covers that eventful day back in November 2008.

So I just have some observations as I go about life in the hood.

Again, why did Wendy Williams get a TV talk show? And who the hell is the fan base that the TV exec is banking on to make this a hit? And why do I want to watch it? Please refresh my memory.

And why can't we have another Black male supermodel? Tyson was too much? We can only have one? I'm done with Make Me a Supermodel--until next season (!)

And who the hell told Kanye he was special, intelligent and our poster child for all things hip and cool? Go Pink on declaring him: " a waste of skin"! Do they not have a censor for Hip Hop artists? I need to deploy the dumb-ass -rapper-need-to- put'em-in-check police squad. Jeez, watch your mouth. And don't believe your own hype. Your lyrics ain't that tight or deep, so what makes you think anything else you'd have to say would be worth listening to?

And what happened to summer jams? We need an anthem.

And when did toothless thugs start rockin' pink? Not mad at a brotha in touch with his feminine side, but thugged out and saggin' in pink ain't cute. Hold a fool up with a pink water pistol? Powder-puff slap a fool in the face? What? I don't get it. And then try to get at a woman? Oy.

And where have all the Black folks gone on TV? VH1's Charm School? And why are we still asking the same old tired questions: "Can Black women and white women communicate"? Of course any intelligent woman can communicate with another regardless of ethnicity or race. Skanks and trailer trash can't talk to anyone. Case closed. Next topic.

ESSENCE Music Fest-- who goes to this and do we not have any artists other than the same ole tired ones that keep singing the same ole tired songs to pick from? Time to bring Tea Dances and rooftop parties back. Cruisin' around the park and backyard BBQs.

Black People: We're just not cool anymore. We've been swaggerjacked.

It's BBQ Time

The unofficial start to summer was this week and just in time came the roasts of all roasts: Spike Lee skewered Tyler Perry. Opinions deferred on Spikes assessment of Tyler's body of work, who likens it to coonin' and buffoonery. Can't say I don't agree on many levels. Others would argue Tyler is simply entertaining folks and who are we to call into play the taste of millions of our good sistas and brothas who find his brand of down-home comedy appealing. Not my taste and certainly not what makes me laugh, but can't say I haven't chuckled at Madea. I can separate coonin' from Uncle Tommin', shuckin' and jivin' from get-over-yourself- lighten-up- and-laugh-at-our- differences-and selves-itain't-that-serious-type stuff. Secretly been waiting for someone to sock it to Madea, whom I liken to a modern day Aunt Jemima, and her alter-ego and creator Tyler Perry, whom we've heralded as the new King of Black Hollywood, the one to save the genre. Not mad at Tyler's grind, just think there are other movies I'd like to see that don't star a man in a dress, a non-acting Pop Tart, same-performance-every-time Denzel or Will Smith, who stopped being a regular Black cat years ago. So Spike, I give it to you for having the courage to say what others have been whispering for years but were too scared to make waves and talk about other Black folks openly--wouldn't. Like the folks who destroyed Hip Hop whom I liken to modern day minstrels, Tyler's Meet the Browns and other characters are setting us back just a tad and relegating those of us with good script ideas and talent to what we've always been forced to do in Hollywood--comedy. Oy.

Now on to roasting of another kind. Wendy Williams Queen Roast a Bitch had her TV talkshow picked up and will be on daily beginning July. This after the critics and viewing audience roasted her ass for setting daytime talk shows back to the days of Robert Downey Jr.. I do have to say she has handed it to a few well deserving egomaniacs, but damn can she learn to read the prompter and not be so mean? Has she looked in the mirror lately? Makes Madea look good and could have been a real contender on RuPaul's Drag Race. I'm just sayin'...How you doin'?!

And speaking of my turn to roast someone, what's up with Kelly I -can't-find-my-lane-since-I left-Destiny's-Child Rowland, co-hosting Bravo's Project Runway pales in comparison replacement The Fashion Show? When did she become a fashion expert? Because she sits on the front row at a few runway shows, now she's a host and giving advice to retail aspiring designers??? Might want to start with your former girl group partner and that crap of a clothing line she calls high fashion--House of Dereon. Like the line goes when a contestant is booted off: "We're just not buying it".

And because, I had to carry the BBQ/roasting folks theme to the end, check out what has to be the funniest roast of a comedian trying to roast someone--ever http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fpmu6efVRk4

That's it. Back to the vineyard